Unlike in America where kindergartners are treated like the five year olds they are, Chinese kindergartners are expected to learn a variety of shows, skits, songs, dances, etc. and continue to turn them out at an unrelenting pace that continues throughout the school year at various occasions. And after having seen my former coworker go through this last year, I thought I was somewhat mentally prepared.
As anyone who has ever tried to teach me how to dance knows, I’m not great at performing choreographed movements. As my mother put it when I asked her about my short stint as a four-year-old ballerina, “I could just tell it wasn’t really going to be your thing.” So sure, I’m coordinated enough to swing a racket and hit a ball over a net, but ask me to twirl in unison or remember which foot or arm or leg bend goes where at what count and you are in for a world of frustration. And in comparison, as anyone who has ever spent any time in any Chinese school knows, Chinese teachers are all gifted with serious dancing coordination and can choreograph a masterpiece ballet on the spot.
I mention all this because every morning the oldest international class (my oldest class) has begun joinging the three local classes outside on the lawn for “morning exercises.” I’ll have to get a video of it because there is no way I can paint a perfect picture of it here. There’s lots of yelling and counting and twisting and stomping and marching. Here’s hoping I never have to lead my class in this because the result will be chaos. It’s definitely a good thing the international class is shoved way off to the side where no one can see them. I imagine this is because the local classes have probably been practicing this routine since their parents first dropped them off at the kindergarten at the wide-eyed age of two. And now my class has to play catch up and be prepared to perform this whole shabang for the National Day on October 1st. I’m crossing my fingers that this event won’t involve me.
So here’s an overview of the morning event. First the kids have to line up with perfect spacing. Then there’s some yelling and stationary marching. Then comes a series of movements, which I suppose are designed to wake you up. The movements are very very Chinese if you can imagine them at all. I always picture the Peoples Liberation Army doing this first thing in the morning. Apparently this is something every Chinese child has learned at school for decades because Jami, (a former cheerleader) once gave an impromptu performance at a malatang restaurant and all the other patrons new exactly what she was doing.
After exercises comes the moving marching. Apparently over my entire educational experience, one thing was left out. And that thing is marching. This is a department in which I am very deficient. And being the only white person over 3 feet tall attempting to march outside on the front lawn for God and China to see is a little intimidating. Fortunately, my co-teacher Leanne has let me stand in the back and try to learn the movements so far. We’ll see how long that lasts.
